Tuesday, August 23, 2005
The Parsi Revolt!
News Flash!
On the occasion of Iranian New Year, peoples of Persian origin have attempted a sudden take over of Mumbai.
The parsee community has attempted to stall the local economy by closing the following institutions that caused widespread panic:
Zorabian Poultry
Juice hair salons
Rustom’s Ice Cream Parlour at Brabourne,
Ratan Tata Institute of Food,
All Tata industries and
Godrej industries.
Bharucha Farsan Mart
In what the local administration terms as a lesser threat Maureen Wadia has threatened to stop the Gladrags Modelhunt. Media houses, model coordinators and choreographers are however up in arms!
Chaotic scenes were witnessed outside every TATA business house at five o’clock but the police relaxed their alert as they discovered that all TATA employees leave at 5 o clock. However there are reports pouring in that employees and top management have been held hostage at TATA Interactive by a woman referred to as WAX. The WAX is a disgruntled employee who apparently was planning to take just the employees of Punjabi origin hostage but decided that after entering the premises with a Baretta, a rendition of Carmen in D minor would have been a nice change for all TIS employees. Negotiations are on to secure the hostages.
600 senior citizens of parsee origin decieded to block all traffic beyond the Dadar parsee colony by forming a barricade of walkers and sadras. The army has been called in to remove the blockades but they have been unsuccessful so far.
The Revolutionary Council for Bawa Youths which boasts membership of all parsees under the age of 30 have proceeded to take over the govenor’s office and mantralaya. Field reports say that the strength of the RCBY is being played down as the number of parsee youth in Mumbai number less than 20.
Noted theatre personality Boman Irani has setup his own propaganda wing for the take over and has said that his first act as Minister of Communications will be to teach all Gujrathis to delete the word “Chhe” from their vocabulary. He was later admitted to hospital after tripped and fell into a cauldron of dhansak made for the troops of the RCBY.
Security advisors in New Delhi are urging citizens to take extreme caution and say that the situation will be diffused in a few hours after STAR world will air a special episode of The Bold and the Beautiful, which would enable the army to tear down the barricades at Dadar. STAR claims that the show is only watched by partially blind and deaf parsees.
Local Shiv Sena corporators have blamed the congress for the turn of events and the congress has blamed the NCP which blamed the Sena for not implementing their own no-outsiders policy. Supremo Bal Thackeray protested that the Sena did not exist so many years ago when the immigration happened and finally blamed the NCP for that.
More news as it develops…..and back to your regular scheduled program, German Philosophy at the WAX Mueller Bhavan.
News Flash!
On the occasion of Iranian New Year, peoples of Persian origin have attempted a sudden take over of Mumbai.
The parsee community has attempted to stall the local economy by closing the following institutions that caused widespread panic:
Zorabian Poultry
Juice hair salons
Rustom’s Ice Cream Parlour at Brabourne,
Ratan Tata Institute of Food,
All Tata industries and
Godrej industries.
Bharucha Farsan Mart
In what the local administration terms as a lesser threat Maureen Wadia has threatened to stop the Gladrags Modelhunt. Media houses, model coordinators and choreographers are however up in arms!
Chaotic scenes were witnessed outside every TATA business house at five o’clock but the police relaxed their alert as they discovered that all TATA employees leave at 5 o clock. However there are reports pouring in that employees and top management have been held hostage at TATA Interactive by a woman referred to as WAX. The WAX is a disgruntled employee who apparently was planning to take just the employees of Punjabi origin hostage but decided that after entering the premises with a Baretta, a rendition of Carmen in D minor would have been a nice change for all TIS employees. Negotiations are on to secure the hostages.
600 senior citizens of parsee origin decieded to block all traffic beyond the Dadar parsee colony by forming a barricade of walkers and sadras. The army has been called in to remove the blockades but they have been unsuccessful so far.
The Revolutionary Council for Bawa Youths which boasts membership of all parsees under the age of 30 have proceeded to take over the govenor’s office and mantralaya. Field reports say that the strength of the RCBY is being played down as the number of parsee youth in Mumbai number less than 20.
Noted theatre personality Boman Irani has setup his own propaganda wing for the take over and has said that his first act as Minister of Communications will be to teach all Gujrathis to delete the word “Chhe” from their vocabulary. He was later admitted to hospital after tripped and fell into a cauldron of dhansak made for the troops of the RCBY.
Security advisors in New Delhi are urging citizens to take extreme caution and say that the situation will be diffused in a few hours after STAR world will air a special episode of The Bold and the Beautiful, which would enable the army to tear down the barricades at Dadar. STAR claims that the show is only watched by partially blind and deaf parsees.
Local Shiv Sena corporators have blamed the congress for the turn of events and the congress has blamed the NCP which blamed the Sena for not implementing their own no-outsiders policy. Supremo Bal Thackeray protested that the Sena did not exist so many years ago when the immigration happened and finally blamed the NCP for that.
More news as it develops…..and back to your regular scheduled program, German Philosophy at the WAX Mueller Bhavan.
# posted by ☭ Comrade Nambiar☭ @ 1:18 AM 
